Though fun and exciting, first dates are nerve-racking. The intent of a first date is to get to know the other person and explore the possibilities of a long-term romantic connection, and even wedlock. However, the pressure and desire of approval by the opposite sex can turn this exciting rendezvous into a nightmare.
Furthermore, the growing popularity of online dating platforms like Match.com, e-Harmony, Tinder, and PlentyofFish is making real-life dating more complicated. Match.com, the most popular dating portal in the U.S. alone has nearly 24 million users browsing through profiles to learn about and connect with singletons in their neighborhood.
the pressure and desire of approval by the opposite sex can turn this exciting rendezvous into a nightmare.
Meeting a woman who’s already made virtual impressions about you and helping her appreciate the real you can be a challenging task. The ensuing stress of making the first impression right amid the preconceptions can lead you to commit dating blunders that can quickly end your first date.
Be aware of the following first-date blunders and avoid them to explore a relationship possibility with this lady who may be THE one.
1.Failing to Have a Plan
Your ability to plan the first date is a huge indication of your thoughtfulness and seriousness in exploring a potential relationship. Enquire about your date’s interests and plan your time so that you both enjoy it equally.
A well-thought-out date has two components: a meal and an activity. Local fine-dining restaurants aren’t too crowded or noisy and offer a romantic setting, allowing the couple to have a decent conversation. Moreover, activities like watching a baseball match or going wine tasting or apple picking can prove to be great ice-breakers, reducing the anxiety and allowing you to enjoy each other’s company.
2. Bragging about Yourself
Dating someone you don’t know enough is awkward and full of uncertainty. You may try hard to make a positive impression on her, but bragging about your past relationships and personal or professional achievements is a definite no. Talking endlessly about your obsessive list of interests and failing to listen to your date can be downright annoying.
Here’s the game plan: Have a few friendly first-date questions in mind that can set the ball rolling. Listen to her response and ask follow-up questions, exhibiting your excellent listening skills.
You don’t have to be an extrovert to find a great conversational rhythm. Be considerate of the non-verbal signals she’s passing on to you. Does she look bored? If yes, change the topic and enquire about her interests and goals in life.
3.Trying Hard to Look Nonchalant
Another common blunder that men make on their first date is to come off as overconfident and casual about the date. A few men also use the ugly practice of negging on their first date to undermine a girl’s confidence, leading her to seek their approval.
Whether you are nervous or playing hard-to-get, overly carefree behavior on your first date can make her feel that you aren’t interested and she’s wasting her time with you. Let your date know that you are interested in knowing about her. It is good to be confident, but equally important to be courteous and involved when you are in her company.
Let your date know that you are interested in knowing about her.
4. Not Dressing Adequately/Overdressing for the Occasion
Linda Blair, Psychologist, and author of Straight Talking shares that it takes only seven seconds to judge a person when you first meet them. Thus, your attire, personal grooming, and body language play a critical role in determining how the date will go.
The way you dress says a lot about your personality. So, dress appropriately on your first date. If the plan is to have dinner at a local bistro, don’t land up in your work attire. Take time to freshen up and change into a pair of well-fitting jeans or cotton-blended pants, a clean and well-ironed t-shirt or button-up shirt, and oxford shoes or sneakers.
In a situation when each aspect of you is being judged or over-processed, going over the top with accessories can be a huge downer. Say no to pretentious accessories and choose one or two sophisticated pieces from an exclusive collection of gold jewelry to emphasize your personality and character.
Pay attention to personal grooming. In a survey conducted by Men’s Health, the world’s best-selling men’s magazine, 50 percent of women shared that they prefer meeting guys who are decently clean. Stray nasal hair or unkempt beard in men is a big turn-off. Take a shower and use mild body cologne to look clean and smell fresh. Make sure you shave or trim your facial hair.
Lastly, practice positive gestures like smiling, keeping your arms open when talking, and offering her a genuine compliment (don’t overdo it), making her feel comfortable.
5.Insisting on Paying the Bill
In this era of feminism, a woman isn’t really attracted to a man who boasts of his affluence by grabbing the check from the waiter or stopping her from handing out her credit card. In fact, a survey conducted by Badoo, a dating-focused social network revealed that 65 percent of women prefer settling the bill on a first date.
Here’s a tip: Ask her if she wants to pay for dessert, while you take care of dinner. Whether she insists on paying the bill herself or going Dutch, stand by her decision without making a fuss about it.
6. Failing to Recover from a Dating Faux Pas
It is okay to commit blunders on your first date. If she’s still interested in spending time with you, apologize for the glitch (if needed) and proceed further. Doing so will prevent the embarrassing situation from taking control of the rest of the date.
Whether you landed up late or irked her with your views on a political topic, remember to get over it and focus on what you are there for.
Predicting how your first date will go is next to impossible. However, avoiding the common blunders on this important occasion can help you make a good first impression, increasing your chances to plan a second romantic date. Use the valuable information shared above to make sure that your first date isn’t your last.